5 September Thursday

There were once three tomatoes. They were planted in three different beds on three different farms entirely separate from one another. Now these three tomatoes, having not ever seen each other weren’t aware of each others existence, but they all found their way off of vines, into crates, onto trucks, and into the farmers markets. A young man was gifted one of these tomatoes by a dear neighbor who knew that he loved them. The other two he’d purchased himself from two different vendors. Suddenly, there they sat, three stranger tomatoes, on one kitchen counter.

The young man, having absolutely nothing else going on in his life, decided to taste the three tomatoes separately to see if he could tell a difference between them. He took a sharp paring knife in his hand and swiveled out the stem of each tomato. He sliced each almost perfectly globe round deep red dry farmed Early Girl into thick slices and dropped a few grains of salt on each. He picked up the first slice, the one that had been the gift.

The flavor was so unsettling, the young man suddenly wondered if there weren’t something wrong with his tongue. For, unless he was mistaken, he could have sworn that he’d just licked the inside of a public swimming pool. It tasted so strong of chlorine, he had to spit it out, which he did as a projectile, into the sink for all to see. Horrible and horrified, the young man poured himself a glass of water, swirled and spat a few times before trying the next tomato.

Puzzled and dismayed, our young hero picked up the slice of the second tomato. He cautiously took a bite. It, too, tasted like chlorine, though less so. It was really bad. At this point, the young man worries that something is off with his palette. He tries the third tomato. It didn’t taste like chlorine, but definitely had the aftertaste of cabbage. The young man turned to his neighbor and asked to try the tomato slices. The neighbor confirms that yes, the tomatoes taste off and overly vegetal. Yes, a little chemically. Well, this won’t do. Why do these three tomatoes taste so bad in the same way? What was our poor young super hero to do?

He made Tomato Basil soup, which tasted really good and there was nothing wrong with it at all.

What’s the moral of the story? I don’t know, I guess there isn’t one.